Still Standing...

December 2, 2011...Today was okay. I passed that test in Blanding class so I was like alright alright. Lol. Didnt do much after class. Came home and basically chilled. I really need to clean up this apartment tho...especially my room.#GoFigure...found out that LacQues removed me as a friend on Facebook. Smh, I could really care less. You can only call & text me when you need money because you know my financial standings. I prefer not to help you if your going to continue to use me. I mean, certain friends i'd go to the end of the world for....he was one but not anymore. The older I got, I realized that money does change you. In fact, I bettered myself. I'm using my money to further my education than high school and making myself financially stable. #LessonLearned...anyways, on the bright side, I plan on asking H.B to skype me on Christmas & while skyping him I'm going to ask for his new digits. I dont know how to ask him how to skype me (suggestions are needed LMAO).

Dear Old Marco

December 1, 2011...sitting on the side of my bed just relaxing for a minute. Had a good, productive day. Went to class. After class I went over my homegirl Keiarre house. We just chilled and chatted. Went back up to the school to go to the library to tweet and facebook. To my surprise, this dude just outta no where chatted me and was like hey. I was like he. He was okay. I was really flattered. I mean, its not like i've never been told that Im cute or sexy...me being a model I get it all the time..but his was different.He eventually asked for my number and I gave it to him. He suppose to be calling at 9. Lets see how this goes...#shoutout to Simone. Lmao, she was cutting up on twitter asking about them digits. Made my day :). One of my friends told me that H.B. was sad lately. Thats a bummer...I might need to check in. When I eventually get the balls to...

Everything is Everything...Right?

November 31, 2011... Man I'm cold as shit. These weather changes are really effecting me. Smh, anyways...last Tuesday my mom childhood friend & practically my uncle was shot. My mom went to view his body at the funeral home. I really couldnt go becuz I couldnt really deal with that forreal. Instead, my mom showed me a picture. He was dressed real nice but I still cant accept the fact that he's dead tho. I mean, I had just seen him the day of the shooting. Wow...shit got real. Anyways, me and Jerk Face got to arguing over Beyonce & Fantasia. Everybody knows I'm a die hard Fantasia Fan and I will not let him disrespect her in front of me. Like, he so fucking ignorant. I'm very glad that I dont date that jackass. #iCantDeal lol. Since we missed Dr. D's birthday and I was off work today...we threw her a surprise party. She really enjoyed it which made my day. After that...came home, went to sleep. After this, headed to the shower and look for me somewhere to live. Maybe Florida, Jersey, Colorado, or California becuz Alabama is really not cutting it no more. Probably move in the next to years just to guarantee that my grandma is situated. -Sigh- well I best get started...#Dueces. 

Bitch Please...Lol!

This blog is from November 29, 2011...First off, hey bloggers! Today was okay. Had class at 11:30 this morning. My professor...Dr. D wasnt there. Usually if she wasnt there, she'd leave our assignment on her desk..but she didnt -__-. Instead, she left some bitch in her slot. This lady was rude as shit to us. Keep in mind, we all young adults and she looks like she's in our age range. I'm basically like...really. So she's not even teaching us shit...no she's texting okay and raising hell. Eventually, me and her gets to arguing becuz I will not be disrespected by no one. Most of our class starts arguing with her becuz she talking to us like we shit...expecially me. Like all she kept saying was "I got 3 degrees...y'all get y'all!" BITCH PLEASE...you went to community college...not a 4 year institute. So as I see it, I'm higher than you love. I didnt let that ruin my day tho. Went and did my photoshoot and came home. Right now, Im listening to Jazmine Sullivan. Welp, finna call my sister Vinsetta and off to bed...#dueces.

Unknown

This blog is from November 28, 2011... Feeling pretty good...just got off the phone with jerk face. ( I can do alot better.) Today is my best friend/brother birthday Bohdi. Havent talked to him in a while since he's in the Army. I kinda miss our convos...along with our other twam (twitter family). We really need to meet up one year...Me, Boh, Kario, & Kajh. Even tho we barely get to talk to each pther due to working, school, etc. we check in every now and then. We'll work on that. Anyways, its 1:32 am, still raining. I have class in less than 7 hours...#GoFigure. Not really sleepy....just me, this bottle of verdi, and Marsha Ambrosius. "Far Away" is whats playing...song seems so damn long but I love it. Right now..."whats on my mind?"....A.L. is. Its like Im consumed with him #NoStalkerShitTho. I mean I wouldnt mind talking to him again...fear.

Flashback

This blog is from November 27, 2011...I'm just not waking up. Its 6 o'clock un the evening  and its pouring down raining. Basically, I slept the whole day away. My dreams were pretty awkward today.  Before, I start on that, I had a good conversation today with my grams. We was talking about new christmas traditions ( I know I'm grown but shit I still miss my childhood.) Anyways, my dreams today were basically flashbacks from 2010 & 2011. I'm not sure where they came from, but I enjoyed some of the clips. Some of them where about HB...guess thats the answer to my prayers. The scenarios in the dream seemed like they use to be...us talking everyday...laughing..etc. But then I had a dream about my friend brother..A.L. Even tho I havent been around him much, they showed times where I was happy with him. #Confused ... at the beginning of 2011, I promised myself I was gonna do some epic shit. I did some but I consider this year an epic fail. None of my other expectations were met becuz I didnt make them...fear. 2010, Im not gonna make any new years resolutions. I'm just going with the flow...make them along the way. :)

Someone Like You

This blog is from November 26, 2011...Its 5 o'clock in the morning & I'm still up. Been clearing my head & thinking alot about my future. I'm exploring the options that maybe...just maybe... we might not ever be together. It hurts to face reality when its ready to kick you in the ass. Yesterday I was on facebook going thru my messages looking for one of my aces number. It loaded some of me and HB old messages instead. Me being me...I read that shit...but this time I didnt get emotional. I analyzed, smiled, laughed, shed a tear, & arcived the messages. The reason I did that is because I realized how much I actually liked you. Lately, i've been listening to Adele. My friends tell me her 21 album reminds them of me so I had to hear it for myself. 'Someone Like You' really related to this situation. The old clishy.."If you love someone you'll do anything to make them happy." I'm letting my emotions get the best of me. Lately I've been having one of my friends brother on my mind. He's smart, funny, independent, & hella cute. We talked on the phone once but ever since then he just stuck in my mind tho....